The unknowns.

Exams are over now but yet, I did not feel the most relaxed in my life ever. In fact, I feel that I am missing a lot in life.

I dont know why but I just couldn't fell asleep after sleeping at 1.30am till now. I just feel so sentimental. Maybe it's the strong emotions I felt after attending the first funeral in my life. It was something that I wish I do not have to undergo anymore cause its really painful.

On my way back, I felt a sudden rush of sadness going through my head. I had no idea why but I just felt that life is rather fragile and I am really tired of living up to people's expectations.

In my life, I've been the good student that everyone else has wanted me to be but I've struggled a lot, really. I might appear to be tough, but I am not. 

In fact, I find myself containing everything within me cause sometimes, I dont feel a need to share it with others cause they might never know/understand and I feel that everyone has their equal level of stress in their lives so why add on to others'?

I hope this sudden sadness is temporary cause I dont wanna feel like this the whole summer. I miss the happy me, the crazy me. 

I miss having a shoulder to rely on, one whom I can call it my own emotional shelter.